After Man Utd had a very lucky and cheating victory yesterday, it was up to Liverpool and Arsenal to brigge the gap between them and  Newcastle, who managed to beat Leeds thanks to the referee being blind. Arsenal went in front through Henry, a french frog, who ate a snail while carrying the ball into the net. Before long, the swedish dog, Freddie Ljdsjaghunberg scored, and it looked like the gooners would win. And they did, but not before Patrick Burger and fries scored. The bookies have predicted that Southampton are 2/1 to win the league, while it is expected that everyone else will be relegated.




Nistelrooy, who scored a hattrick, while wearing Man United 63rd homekit traning style kit, has just been seen, smiling. He was subsitutued soon after, Nistelrooy started to cry like a stupid whining baby, just before Saints scored to make it 4-1. Man Utd players say "Without Nistelrooy, we are gonna lose very badly, maybe even concede 27 goals"

Meanwhile, it has been predicted by every football fan that the Saints (who rule and kick ass)will win 10-3 at Old Trafford. A spokesman for Man Utd said "we are gonna lose badly"

Sven Goran Erikson has just announced that every English and foreign player in saints history will be brought into the England squad for the World Cup in 2002. Sven mentioned "All the other players like Beckham, Owen and Gerrard are shite, and we will lose the World Cup, unless Le Tissier and Beattie are up front". John Motson also added "Being a pundit, I can say that this will help us beat Argentina 12-0, and win us the World Cup. The other players available are just too crap".